Gratitude

I'm feeling pretty good today. Yesterday was kind of "blah" but I feel re-energized right now. At least as of 2:30 in the afternoon. I thought maybe I would try to change the tone of today's post to something happier. An expression of gratitude if you will.

Perhaps the one good thing that has come out of my anxiety is the incredible people that I've had in my life which have helped me deal with it. There are way too many people to thank, friends, family, mission buddies, doctors, etc. So I'll just do one big shout out to everyone and say Thank you.

I hate Anxiety and depression. Hate it. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. However, I am grateful for the relationships that have come out of it and the feelings of kinship I have with others who have gone through similar situations. It's a bonding experience that comes from something horrible. It's a constant reminder that there are others around you who are going through the same things you are or who have already dealt with it and are willing to extend a hand down into your darkness.

If there is one thing I've learned from my experiences thus far, it's that being quiet and trying to deal with it on your own is not the answer. I was able to beat down my anxiety upon arriving home from my mission and ignored it. I didn't really talk about it and I thought if I just didn't worry about it, it wouldn't keep happening. I thought I had removed myself from the problem and that the illness would go away. I didn't know that the problem was inside of me and was just waiting to bubble over again. Now I know that was the wrong thing to do. It's certainly something we don't have to go through alone.

So today I am grateful. Grateful for my family and friends who've supported me. Those who've reached out to me. Those who've listened to my crazed worry-filled exclamations day in and day out. Today is a good day and I'm going to enjoy it for what it is, while it lasts. It's these moments that are stress free that I've come to appreciate most.

This made me smile: